Defeated by silence.
“You don’t smile anymore…” What hurts the most about breaking up, is thinking about what was yet in store becoming part of storage. Who knows about the happiness a couple can soon share, when the time will never come. I couldn’t find a sense of motivation to smile, a real smile… One that can enlighten a soul, and tell a story. “Seems like I don’t know how anymore.” You don’t necessarily learn how to smile. It is simply just a reaction triggered by the mind to reveal emotion, a feeling streaming in from the heart. He wanted to talk about what became of our relationship. It’s been some time since I have seen him, a while since we were last together. The moment I saw him, I knew he wasn’t mine anymore. It was a surprise that he wanted to see me… Sometimes a part of you wonders if they still remember you… Now that he was right in front of me, all that I longed to say to him vanished and I was speechless. A part of me wanted to yell, argue because an unexpected break up was at hand. A part of me wanted to cry, just another man who told me he wouldn’t hurt me… Just another human being who promised he wouldn’t give up on me. A part of me wanted to stand up and leave, but a part of me wanted to stay and forgive him. Even for someone like him, as important as he was, I had to remind myself not to let my guard down. Most of the time, we were defeated by silence. We had so much to say, but not a single word was able to slip out. Until he said, “is there anything I can do to make you smile again?” But there was nothing. Not anymore…
And then I woke up.
